A few weeks ago, in an attempt to reach more voters, Kamala Harris appeared on every talk show, radio program, and podcast in America. She spoke with everyone from Charlemagne tha God to Stephen Colbert, Howard Stern to the ladies on The View, Bill Whitaker on 60 Minutes to Alex Cooper on the podcast, “Call Her Daddy.”

I think my grandmother, who died back in 2003, is the only one who still watches 60 Minutes. (Am I Right?) And I’d never even heard of “Call Her Daddy,” which is apparently the most popular podcast for young women in America… meaning I am no longer a young woman in America. I will be processing that on my own time.

For our purposes today, I simply want to highlight the fact that Kamala is doing everything in her power to expand her demographic.

But something she said on that podcast I’ve never heard of gained a tremendous amount of media attention. And it really stuck out to me because even though it gave me a little thrill to hear her say it, I knew how it would immediately alienate the exact women she has yet to reach.

Apparently, at a campaign event for Trump, Sarah Hukabee Sanders, made a comment about how her kids keep her humble and then said: “Unfortunately, Kamala Harris doesn't have anything keeping her humble.” (Yeah, not good).

“How did that make you feel,” asked Cooper?

Alex was obviously trying to dig in to Kamala’s feelings around being disparaged for being the step mother of her children as opposed to the biological mother of her children, a topic Harris went on to handle beautifully. But it was Kamala’s gut reaction to the jibe that really grabbed me.

“I don't think she understands that there are a whole lot of women out here who, one, are not aspiring to be humble” said Harris.

And I was all, like, “whaaaat!?” Talk about saying the quiet part out loud! I was stunned to hear a woman - even a woman literally running to be president of the United States - reject the idea that humility was something she should aspire to. Stunned.

Which is striking because Harris is not wrong. Humility is one of those virtues we respect, but it isn’t one many people strive for. In fact, striving to be humble is almost a contradiction in terms. I mean, sure you can go out and work at it. But the paradox of humility is that moment you realize you’ve achieved it, is kind of the exact moment when you lose it. Right?

You can’t exactly pat yourself on the back for being so humble. Good job not taking credit for that! What a humble person I am for letting that person do all the talking. It just doesn’t work that way.

But I have to say that as a woman, and especially as a woman who was raised in a conservative Christian environment, it was amazing to hear Harris say that not every woman is aspiring to be humble, because the need to be humble, the need to not think too highly of myself, the pressure to be demure, the importance of putting others first -but most especially men - was drilled into me from day one. Are there any women here who can relate? Thank you.

Growing up as a Christian, I was not just taught to “love my neighbor as myself,” but to love others the way Jesus loved us; Jesus who said, “greater love hath no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends,” before going off and doing just that (John 15:13).

I memorized verses like Philippians 2:3-6:

“(Therefore) Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. 5 Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God as something to be grasped, but emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness. And being found in human form, he humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death—even death on a cross.”

Layer a healthy dose of patriarchy and some garden variety misogyny on top of that type of kenotic theology and you have a perfect recipe for overwork with a side of low self-esteem.  You create women whose self worth is directly tied to their capacity for self denial, self-sacrifice, and self-abasement, which is it’s own terrible paradox.

You create women adept at keeping quiet so that the men in their world can speak; so quiet that after awhile they can’t even hear themselves think. Women who have no idea what they want or need or could accomplish on their own because they were never allowed to truly listen to themselves or believe in the worth of their contributions.

Women with terrible boundaries who will defer their needs, their dreams, and their ambitions indefinitely if there is someone else who needs anything or anyone else who needs something.

And there’s always someone, right? There’s always something.

But who are you to say, “no” to a friend in need so you can focus on your thesis?

Who are you to say “no” to watching the kids so you can go back to work?

Who are you to say “no” to baking cupcakes for the PGO or a pie for the church fair so you can meet that deadline which would lead to that promotion which would put you on top?

Who are you to say, “no,” to anyone, when Jesus said, “yes,” to the cross for the sake of everyone!

Now I realize I am being very gendered here and that it’s not that simple. When it comes to gender it never is.

I know that things have changed over the years such that there are plenty of domineering women who could turn it down a notch and plenty of reserved men who would be of more service to the world if they’d speak up, to say nothing of non-binary people whose voices are vital as we continue to chart a course for the future that honors everyone.

I know this doesn’t only apply to the lived experience of women. I know we could look at this through a lens of race or class or ability or orientation and no doubt find similarities amongst any group that has been historically marginalized.

But that is precisely why I feel the need to highlight Harris’ rejection of humility before we look more closely at Jesus’ words to James and John, because it would be a tragedy for the words of the gospel to silence the very people they are meant to liberate.

It would be a tragedy to think humility, a desire to serve, or the value of putting others first is the problem.

The problem, my friends, comes when we construe humility as an acceptable form of humiliation rather than a proper sense of self-regard, and then embrace that construction as a tool of oppression rather than liberation.

Let me say that again. The problem comes when we construe humility as an acceptable form of humiliation rather than a proper sense of self-regard, and then embrace that construction as a tool of oppression rather than liberation.

If we go back to what Sarah Huckabee Sanders said, we find a humorous self-deprecating anecdote. She said that she had “once teared up while watching her daughter get ready for a father-daughter dance, and her daughter said, “It’s OK, Mommy, one day you can be pretty too” (https://www.nytimes.com/2024/09/18/us/politics/sanders-harris-children-backlash.html).

According to Huckabee Sanders, her child was keeping her humble by taking her down a peg, by making her realize she didn’t quite measure up, by putting her in her place.

But a spiritually healthy sense of humility isn’t thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking about yourself less. That sounds very biblical, doesn’t it? Yeah. I actually got that from Facebook. But it doesn’t mean it isn’t true. I think it’s a great definition.

Humility isn’t thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.

If you apply that to the scripture today you realize that the problem with James and John was not their ambition, but that their ambition was so self-centered.

James and John want to sit at Jesus’ right and left in glory and they are willing to suffer and die with him if it means they will be rewarded in the end. The disciples are angry and resentful, not because James and John have missed the point, but because they didn’t think to ask Jesus first, and are now afraid they’ll be left out. It’s like James and John called shot gun and now they’re all relegated to the back seat, forever.

Notice that Jesus isn’t frustrated with any of them for being ambitious or wanting good things. Their ambition to follow Jesus is good. Here they are, finally understanding that being his disciple may well cost them their lives and they’re still willing to stick by him. That ambition is giving them the courage and drive to hang in there with him and stay the course.

What I think is so fascinating in this story is that Jesus meets them right where they are. He doesn’t throw out their ambition and desire for good things but instead seizes upon it and attempts to shape it into an ambition and desire for the common good.    

“You know that among the Gentiles those whom they recognize as their rulers lord it over them, and their great ones are tyrants over them. 43But it is not so among you; but whoever wishes to become great among you must be your servant, 44and whoever wishes to be first among you must be slave of all.”

Take that desire for greatness, says Jesus, take that desire to be first, and use it well. Don’t use your power over others but use your power to serve others. Take hold of your power, like I do. Put it out into the world for the sake of others and then you’ll be on the right track.

Jesus meets them right where they are. Likewise, throughout the scriptures, Jesus meets the meek where they are as well, but instead of tamping them down, he lifts them up. I think of the woman with the alabaster jar who will wash his feet with her hair.

When Judas reprimands her for wasting money, Jesus says, “Leave her alone. … She did what she could. … Truly I tell you, wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will …be told, in memory of her.”

Jesus invited the rich man to relinquish his privilege by giving all he owned away and he took a little boy’s loaves and fishes and fed a multitude. He course corrected the self righteous while encouraging tax collectors and sinners saying they would enter the kingdom of God before even the holiest Scribe or Pharisee.

My point is that: rich or poor, male or female, meek or proud, selfish or selfless, religious or sacrilegious, Jesus meets us where we are for the sake of the world, because that is his chief concern… his real agenda. Jesus came not to be served but to serve and he believes that we can do the same. He is willing to work with us all so we can use our particular gifts for the good of all.

So for those of you who are full of ambition and confidence and ego, that may mean learning to do things for others and not just for yourself. It may mean holding back so others can speak or leveraging your power to lift others up. And for those of you who struggle to believe that you matter or can make a difference, it may mean learning to trust in your worth and ability so you can actually do something with the gifts you have been given.

A healthy humility does not require that any of us to dim our light or play it small or forego the opportunity to speak up, strive, achieve, or succeed. Humble people can do all of those things. Think of the giants of our faith -  people like the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., St. Francis, Dorothy Day, Mother Teresa, Jimmy Carter, Henri Nouwen.

We hail them for their accomplishments. We admire them for daring to put themselves out there and live differently. We lift them up for proclaiming unpopular and uncomfortable truths to the roof tops, for capturing people’s attention and imagination, for speaking truth to power. But dig into the lives of any one of them and you will be treated to a masterclass in how to overcome self doubt.

They all show us that true humility isn’t about hiding, denying, or downplaying our gifts, our position, our abilities, or our accomplishments. Nor is it an excuse to hang back. True humility is about using all of the gifts God has bestowed upon us for the advancement of all rather than for ourselves alone.

The giants of our faith turned their influence toward the common good, they used their voice to speak up for others, they used their abilities to shine a light on the invisible, they used their power - and it was power - for the sake of the world.

So my friends, but especially those of you who were conditioned to play it small in an effort to be humble, maybe stop striving to be humble for your own sake and focus instead on striving for to be good for the sake of others.

Lay claim to what you can do. Lay claim to the gifts God has given you. Lay claim to the love and light within you and use it without apology to shine bright for the those around you.

Let that same spirit be in you that was in Jesus Christ, a savior who embraced his own humanity even as he embraced us in all of ours; a savior who didn’t let his limits or anyone else’s, stop him from doing his very best to serve and save this world. Amen.